Thursday, January 26, 2012

T-Toys: The Bondage Bar

Today's Toy is the Bondage Bar from Exciting Toys.


Bondage Bar


This toy is great for the Dom or the sub that's just starting out or even the more seasoned ones of us in the Lifestyle. And for those of you looking just to add some spice to your relationship this is a great way to get your sub or your lover into that perfect position: ass up and at your mercy.


The Bondage Bar is $43.20 plus tax, shipping and handling, at Exciting Toys (Bondage Bar at Exciting Toys). It ships in 3 days and is (from what I've been told, very comfortable for the one wearing it).


The site says: A classic bondage item is now out of the dungeon and in your bedroom. Soft, neoprene cuffs are attached to a rigid, metal bar to keep your partner in place.


The thing that I love the most about this toy is that it is very much self explanatory. A lot of the bondage toys that I've used over the years are complicated  (Insert Tab A into Tab B and then pull Tab C through Slot D and click with Hole F), whereas this is fasten and tighten.


I am sure that for those of you who are interested in exploring the Lifestyle or your more kinky side will enjoy this.


And if you add a flogger, crop, paddle or lovely G-spot/Prostate dildo with it, you're guaranteed a good time.






Happy Spankingz,


The Dom

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Gloria Brame

So today (since The Dom is writing and the subs are working, resting, sleeping) I, your loving Dom, am going to highlight someone that I admire.


Gloria Brame (http://www.gloriabrame.com) her website says this about her:

Dr. Gloria G. Brame is one of the world's foremost clinical sexologists.  An author, therapist, and seasoned media sexpert, you'll find her quoted in magazines such as Cosmopolitan, GQ, Men's Health, Maxim, Playboy, and Redbook.


Dr. Brame also has a few books that I find very interesting:


"Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission" Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submissionwhich has this as the blurb: 

      Still in print after 17 years, Playboy called Different Loving "a detailed, eye-opening account of the real sexual            

     underground in America...a thorough and serious study" and readers have called it the Bible of SM.

A breakthrough in sexual literature, this work is a complete, comprehensive user-friendly guide to and tour through the world of alternative sexual lifestyles. While the topics are exotic and erotic, the authors handle each one in a sensitive, thorough, analytical, and fascinating way and manage to explain a secret world to those who might wish to visit.



    From Kirkus Reviews

Few books come with warning labels, but this one does: ``Readers should not attempt any of the activities described in these pages.'' Why not? Because the outr‚ sexual practices described by the Brames (she: a former therapist; he: a former archaeologist) and Jacobs (a freelance writer) in this bold report carry psychological and, often, physical risks--though that hasn't stopped the two-hundred-odd practitioners whom the authors interviewed, nor the millions who share their passion for sexual dominance and submission (D&S). All D&S, the authors explain, involves a ``power exchange'' in which one partner ``tops,'' or dominates, and the other ``bottoms,'' or submits--whether through bondage, wrestling, whipping, body-piercing, etc. After running through the history of D&S scholarship--with expected nods at Krafft-Ebbing and Havelock Ellis--the Brames and Jacob present an overview of the practices themselves, which range from infantilism (the bottom often wears a diaper and sucks on a bottle) and depersonalization (the bottom may act like an object, perhaps a footstool, or an animal, most often a pony) to spanking, cross-dressing, foot fetishes, enemas, branding, and so on. The authors discuss the methods, psychological bases, and historical backgrounds of the practices, each of which is illuminated by interviews with practitioners who speak with great seriousness (``Deliberate, ritualized infliction of what we call pain can change the relationship of the body and that which lives in the body,'' says Fakir Musafar, who likes to dangle from trees by way of ``fleshhooks''). And as for the risks, nearly all of these sexual outlaws identify with the ``Scene'' (the vast D&S underground that's highly self-aware: Two thousand infantilists, for example, belong to a ``Diaper Pail Fraternity'') and with its credo of ``Safe, Sane, and Consensual.'' The definitive guide to the sexual styles of those who walk on the wild side. -- Copyright ©1993, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

There is also her book "Come Hither"
Come Hither: A Commonsense Guide To Kinky SexA fun, commonsense guide to kinky sex, Come Hither, is the official guide to kink at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality.
Amazon Blurb: How do you tell your partner that you'd like to be spanked?
Where can you find a good dominatrix?
If your husband like to wear your panties, does that mean he's gay?
What really goes on at SM clubs?
After you tie someone up, what exactly are you supposed to do?
Is there such a thing as normal sex?
If you've ever wondered about the ins and outs of bondage, spanking, or cross-dressing, look no further. Come Hither is a frank, friendly guide on how to turn your secret fantasies into satisfying expressions of love and desire. The official resource guide for SM/fetish sex at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, Come Hither proves that a little kink can be a lot of fun.


And Editorial Reviews:


   Review

Bob Berkowitz author of His Secret Life Come Hither is accessible, fun to read, informative, and sexy all at the same time. I highly recommend it.

Dr. Robert T. McIlvenna President, The Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality Dr. Brame is simply the best tour guide I know for your travel in the world of kinky sex.

And Finally "The Truth about Sex: A Sex Primer for the 21st Century":
The Truth About Sex, A Sex Primer for the 21st Century Volume I: Sex and the SelfRenowned bestselling author Dr. Gloria G. Brame's newest book, The Truth About Sex, Volume 1 - Sex and the Self, has just been published and is available via Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble. The Truth About Sex is the first of a planned three-volume set of books that gives adults the basic tools to have a happy and satisfying sex life. It is also available as an e-book.
Amazon blurb:
Have you ever wondered why we think one type of sex is better than another? Are inhibitions or confusion about sex holding you back? Do you think you're a sex addict? Have you given up on having good orgasms with your partner? Are you worried sex will break up your relationship? The Truth About Sex will set you free.
The Truth About Sex is an important new work by internationally renowned sex therapist, bestselling author (Different Loving, Come Hither), and sex blogger/historian (Gloria's Oversexed Mind, The Bilerico Project), Gloria G. Brame, Ph.D. Twenty years of Dr. Brame's research on human sexuality is distilled into three fast-paced volumes that will change the way you look at sex. They offer reality-based models which combine Brame's original theories, hard facts, and over 10 years of highly successful, results-oriented sex therapy. Brame addresses the most intimate, complicated questions about sex in page-turning, warmly empathic prose. Using cutting-edge sex and medical studies, historical research, and composite case studies from her private practice, she teaches adults how to make sexual ecstasy a reality.
Volume 1, SEX AND THE SELF, is a complete primer on masturbation, orgasm and new models for talking about, thinking about and understanding your inner sexual identity. It includes Dr. Brame's best clinical techniques for improving sexual performance and increasing every adult's potential for complete sexual satisfaction.
About the Author:
Gloria G. Brame is a sex therapist and best-selling author (Different Loving, Come Hither). She holds an M.A. in English from Columbia University (GSAS 1978) and a Ph.D. from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (2000). Her frequently censored yet astonishingly popular blog, Gloria's Oversexed Mind, covers all aspects of sexual history, and was selected for "Best of SexBlogs 2010" and "NY Sex Bloggers Calendar 2011." Professor of Human Sexuality, Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (San Francisco); Fellow, Erotic Heritage Museum (Las Vegas); named "Hero of the Sexual Revolution" (Exodus Trust, 2006); regular contributor to The Bilerico Project, the Sexual Health Network, and iFriends Adult Forums. Frequently cited in Cosmo, Men's Health, Esquire, GQ and other print and digital media. Google Gloria Brame or follow DrGloriaBrame on Twitter.

And the Reviews:

   Review

Healthy sexuality is fundamental to building healthy lives, relationships, communities and societies, and we all could use some guidance. This honest and reassuring book is an excellent resource for those seeking greater confidence in, and understanding of, this basic right. Thank you, Dr. Brame! --Nina Hartley, R.N., Author of Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex

If you don't have a sex therapist on speed dial, Dr. Gloria Brame will be your emergency contact. Calling shenanigans on the way our culture deals with sexuality, The Truth About Sex plants a sex-positive flag into the American landscape. --Megan Andelloux, Certified Sexuality Educator, Board Certified Sexologist

The Truth About Sex by Dr. Gloria Brame is the talk every parent should have with their children, their partner(s) and, most importantly, themselves. The first step in affirming sexual freedom as a fundamental human right is one's own sexual liberation. Dr. Brame's book outlines a clear path toward that goal! --Ricci Joy Levy, Executive Director, The Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance

Gloria Brame takes readers from masturbation to orgasm in an easy and forthright manner. This informative volume doesn't leave readers wanting more; it shows them just how to get satisfaction on their own. --Bil Browning, Editor-in-Chief, The Bilerico Project

Insightful, smart, and subversive in sexy ways, Dr. Gloria Brame brings a refreshingly original perspective to the study of human sexuality in all its dimensions and permutations. --Dr. Sandor Gardos, Sex Therapist and Founder of MyPleasure.com


So I encourage you to go out and read Dr. Brame's books and check out her website and her blog: http://gloriabrame.typepad.com/inside_the_mind_of_gloria/

Happy Spankingz!
-The Dom

Monday, January 16, 2012

Remember Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

I remember memorizing Dr. Martin Luther King Jr's speech when I was a kid just for the hell of it. Now that I'm older, I actually understand what I memorized as a kid. A country where neither race, religion, sexuality, gender, profession, or education stopped you from receiving basic human rights. A country where no one was a second-class citizen. A country where we lived our pledge: "With liberty and justice FOR ALL." Yes, Dr. King had a dream and it was a marvelous one and I share it with him.



Tuesday, January 10, 2012

To Tide You Over-NSFW (REALLY NSFW)

Since there's no new post from us until Thursday, here are some NSFW videos to tide you over.

Be forewarned, when I say NSFW, I'm talking porn people.

So no one under the age of 18 okay?!

Seriously.

Send the kid to bed.

And you! You're not 18. You shouldn't even be following the blog. Shoo! Go away and come back when you're of age.

Seriously.

Okay now that the kids are gone....

For my M/M lovers:




For my F/F lovers (b/c yes, there are some who follow this blog who are lesbian or bisexual):




Enjoy your videos!!


Happy Spankingz!

Monday, January 9, 2012

(Poker) A Sexy Game For Couples: Strangers In The Night

Hello out there to all of you lovely subs, Doms, vers, and curious, but not so innocent, bystanders.

We here at the Poker, Sex, Doms and Toys blog are glad we're in a new year and we are more than ready to hit the ground running.

We've made some resolutions for ourselves this year and they're not just your typical run of the mill, diet more, eat less type of resolutions.

We're going to blog about things more.

More Poker.
More Sex.
More Doms (and subs).
More Sex.
More Toys.
And did we mention
More Sex?

So more than the every other week blog posts. We are committing to a new blog, twice a week.

And we're going to keep to it.

So this week, you get: Poker (Games for couples) and Sex (Positions and Stories).

And we're going to give you some guest posts, some NSFW pictures, some videos, some audio......

And some fabulous short stories from author friends who all love to write about, you guessed it: Poker, Sex, Doms and Toys.

Aren't you excited?

We sure are.

First Up!

Poker!

Here's your fun game for the week......

You walk into the crowded bar. It's smoky. You can hardly breathe and you're wondering why in the world you're even in this place, when suddenly you get the distinct feeling that you are being watched. You look up and your eyes connect with the gaze of the most gorgeous and stunning stranger that you've ever met. You take a deep breath and swallow thickly before making your way towards the bar, through the thick herd of people, sniffing at each other desperate to find a partner for the night, another animal to run against, underneath, on top of, inside of, and inevitably right up to the one person that stole your entire attention from the second you saw them.

"Hi," they say.

"Hello," you respond.

"Come here often?" they ask.

You want to tell them that that's the corniest line that you ever heard, but you bite your tongue, you open your mouth to respond pleasantly instead and thus, the dance begins.......

To the outside observer, they would never know that the person you're talking to is your partner, your chosen "animal," and you're doing nothing but heating up the passion between the two of you.

Lots of couples do this. Brad and Kate from the movie "Four Christmases" (starring Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon-Kristin Chenoweth was hilarious as Reese's sister, Courtney, btw) pull off this delightful stunt/game at the very beginning of the movie.

It's a great way for you to test your pickup lines that you practice in the shower and don't want anyone to know about, but that you know would work if you tried them. It also gives you and your significant other the chance to dress up (or dress down), flirt with each other, drink, dance, and play on that whole, one-night-stand, sex with a stranger fantasy.

Go ahead, give it a shot. This is what askmen.com had to say about it:


Be strangers
Agree to meet at a bar, but act like you don't know each other. It may seem strange at first, but once you get home and start having sex, it'll feel like the first time.



Once at the bar, where you'll spot them looking hotter than ever, approach them, ask their name and make small talk. Then, buy them a drink, or five, and ask them to come back to your place. When he/she agrees (a huge ego booster in front of other guys who've been watching this entire episode unfold), take him/her home and have the best one-night stand of your life.

Read more: http://www.askmen.com/dating/love_tip_200/229b_love_tip.html#ixzz1iqB1Km6h




Have fun all everyone!


Happy Spankingz,

The Dom

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy New Year's!!!

2011 was an awesome year for me. I found my lifetime commitment sub, fell in love and am being successful in my career. Here's hoping that 2012 will be even better, not just for me but for all of you as well!

Thanks for following the blog!












  





Happy New Year and you all stay safe out there!

The Members of the P,S,D&T blog
-The Dom, Vic
The Sexiest Sub, Daniel
The Most Adorable Sub, Kat

Sunday, December 25, 2011